I learned a very valuable lesson in 2018 and it is a lesson that now consider a LIFE LESSON. This lesson has to do with something we all have…
Let me start with a little background. I am not sure where this came from, I think it was a conversation that I was having with God and she spoke to me very clearly so that I could understand. For years I have put myself in a position as a “people pleaser” always worried about what people would say or think about me. In 2018, I came to the realization that it isn’t really about me. Nope. It has aways been about the other person. More so, the other persons ego.
You see, every year I have to attend family functions where I am not seen as a part of the family. More importantly, I have to be surrounded by people that I don’t want to be around. However, I still have to put on this front that I am “happy” to be in the presence of people who don’t and never will see me as family. This past year I ask myself, why?
Why do I put myself in a position to not feel welcome?
Why do I continue to smile and parade around as if i am happy to be in the presence of those who don’t treat me as family?
Then while in a moment of peace and reflection I figured it out. Simply put, I do it for the sake of the egos of others. I do it so the other person doesn’t look bad. I do it so the other person can continue to live in the fairytale that all is well and perfect. But in reality, it isn’t, and it hasn’t been for a very long time.
At what point can you put another persons ego in check?
What about me?
I’m always the one sacrificing for the egos of others. Always walking around with a smile on my face when deep down things are not as what they seem. Funny thing, the other person will never ask if you are ok, they will never check-in to see if you are even comfortable being in a situation that actually makes you uncomfortatble. Nope. The reason is simple, their ego is more important than your feelings. So, this year I am making a promise to myself not to be put into situations where I am not comfortable. I will exercise my right to say NO even if it means crushing someones ego. Please keep in mind that feelings and egos are two totally different things.
It is not my job to continue to stroke your ego when you never consider me. In other words, your ego is not my problem. If you are seeking validation, encouragement amongst others things all while having my feelings in limbo… then…
I am not the one.
My ego has aways put others first but thanks to this new found realization, not anymore. Now is the time to keep my self peace in tact and to let go of the burdens and expections of others. This is has been one of the most freeing things I have ever done in my life.
Bring It On 2019
What are your thoughts on people and egos?
SHOP THE OUTFIT
*FTC Disclosure* This post may contain affiliate links. Which means if you click on an affiliate link from my blog and make a purchase, it’s possible that I may make a small commission from that sale. I sincerely appreciate your support of the sponsors that help make this blog possible! I only partner with brands that are consistent with my blog’s brand.